Thoughts on New Beginnings

As I begin my fall at Gannon University (my 20th year of teaching...YIKES!) and my time as Vicar of St. Mary's, Lawrence Park (my first appointment in a pastoral leadership position...ALSO YIKES!), I am surprisingly calm (in spite of the YIKES's!). Maybe it's my age. Next week I celebrate my 46th birthday - old enough to be taken seriously and not too old to be dismissed as passe - and the decades of experience in higher education, the five years in collegial ministry with a few churches in the Erie diocese, my personal experience in interpersonal relationship (is it possible that my wife and I have managed to maintain a healthy and productive marriage for a quarter of a century as of next June?!?). And perhaps it is all of these things combined that have allowed me a kind of gentle acceptance of how things have been, how they are, and how they may be in the future.

Granted, I've never been one to worry too much about things that are not under my control - though I haven't always been this way, and there are moments when I get a little panic. But as I get older, I find that life is much more about riding the waves, rather than dodging them (or creating them!). It's also the perspective that things are not obstacles to my projected path, but rather the path itself is not so unidirectional and linear. My wants and desires are should not be locked into my sights, and I should not be thrown when things shift in direction.

This freedom to respond to change is an embracing of the wonderful chaos which is God's creation - and try as we might, human beings are never going to fit God into neat patterns, behaviors, texts, or expectations. God will be God, and it is not for us to try to assess any kind of intentionality to the things that surprise, disappoint, jolt, or elude our own direction. Rather, it is the calm acceptance of things that brings about the greatest sense of satisfaction as well as the kindest response to perceived obstacles.

I know that it's cliche to say "let go and let God," but I still find great comfort in this phrase - a phrase that encourages personal growth and adaptablility, as well as a greater chance that the we will be embracing God's way, rather than imposing our own.

In some ways, the landmarks of this fall and the coming year are hardly landmarks at are. Sure they are a time for reflection on the paths that bring us to where we are; but they are also wonderful opportunities for us to wait in hopeful anticipation of what suprises God may have for us around the next bend in our path.

Peace!